I’ve been single for a long time.  Like a reeaallly long time.  And truth be told, I used to really dislike Valentine’s Day.  I used to dread the day when everyone around me (it seemed), celebrated their love for each other.  No matter where I looked, there was an endless array of pink and red…flowers…chocolates.  You get the picture.  Walk into any grocery store and you may find yourself tangled in a web of red, heart shaped balloons.  

And I wasn’t sitting around, feeling sorry for myself (ok maybe I was…once or twice) or feeling jealous of my friends (ok maybe I was…once or twice). The 14th of February just simply reminded me of my singleness.  And it’s not something I wanted to be reminded of. 

I was preparing for my Holy Yoga class earlier this week and something struck me…like a light bulb finally turned on.  I was writing about the love of God and reading in Song of Songs.  I came to the verse where it says, “I have found the one who my soul loves.”  

This was the moment where what I knew in my head finally migrated down to my heart.  I KNOW God’s love is enough.  But if I’m being honest, it didn’t always FEEL like enough.  Being 35 and single, I have felt like something (ok, someone) was missing from my life. And when I read that scripture, something clicked.  It’s like my heart took a deep breath and said, “Oh.  There you are Jesus.  YOU are the one who my soul loves.”  

Because He loved me first.  Because there is absolute freedom in His love.  Because His love makes me whole and fills up all of my empty and broken places.  Because He gave up all that He had and was-just to save me.  Knowing I would never be able to pay Him back for his sacrifice.  Knowing I would mess up again and again.  This, my friends is a “soul” love.  A love deeper than we can ever know or experience here on this earth.  

A couple of years ago, I decided to really embrace Valentine’s Day.  And by embrace, I mean, I started sending out Valentine cards.(Go ahead and laugh)  I can never get it together to send out Christmas cards, so I thought, why not?  Let’s get crazy and celebrate love of all kinds (Insert the mental image of my face, along with the faces of my animals, plastered to a glossy rectangle that says something cute about Valentine’s Day).  

But now-after reading this scripture and having the “aha” heart moment, I can say with all honesty…my heart is full.  So full of the love of Jesus.  No matter what the future holds, I am not without.  I am not lacking.  I have all that I need and will ever need in the love of Christ.  And if…or when my mister walks into my life, it will only add to what I already have.  Like the icing on the cake.