Do you ever have those pivotal conversations with a friend or loved one that leave you in a perpetual state of deep thought?  It’s the kind of verbal interaction that haunts you for days.  Like, you’re walking around with a punctuation filled text bubble hovering above your head.

I had such a conversation 6 days ago and I’m still mulling.

Thank God for those who help us see.  The ones who speak Jesus Truth to us in our hour of need.  The ones who don’t water it down with spiritual anythings, but who listen and respond with knife-sharp sincerity.

It’s one of the beautiful ways the Lord uses community to edify the saints.  Wouldn’t you agree?

Usually accompanied by the adjective ‘authentic,’ I feel like the term ‘community’ is the latest buzz word in churches these days.  I wonder if my own ears have become somewhat immune…this happens at times when one hears things over and over and over.  Our minds have already processed what those words mean, so we let them pass by without another thought.

It’s the experience though-the living out of vulnerable, real and sometimes raw honesty that drives the point home.

And this is what Jesus modeled for us with the disciples.  Yes, he had his 12-man inner circle.  But there were others (even women) who traveled with him, ate with him, even exchanged dialogue with him.

One of these women was Mary of Magdala, most often referred to as Mary Magdalene.  Scripture gives us only a short glimpse into her scandalous past.  After her encounter with the Healer, she became a devout follower and friend.  When others in Jesus’ inner circle abandoned him at the crucifixion, she was one of the women who stayed.  And she was present at the tomb.  She was actually the first person to whom Jesus appeared after his resurrection.

But, she didn’t know it was him.  And this is where my heart lands tonight.  Though, I admit it’s hard to bypass the other messages I find in her story….

John 20:14 NLT

“She turned to leave and saw someone standing there.  It was Jesus, but she didn’t recognize him.”

This is how I picture the scene: (my paraphrase)

It’s early and the sky is still dark.  She’s been up all night, unable to rest or sleep.  Her tears come in waves, grief settling in like an unwelcome guest.  She can’t get the image of the cross out of her head.  She arrives at the tomb and notices right away that it’s open.  Bewildered, she can’t help but peek inside, maybe hoping to catch one last glance of her Lord.  She looks to the right and to the left, eyes widening in worry.  “Where is he?” she cries…Jesus’ body is gone.  Baffled, upset and afraid, she turns to go, eyes filling with tears.  And as she turns around, she comes face to face with her risen Lord.  But she doesn’t see that it’s him.  He even asks her why she’s crying and who it is she’s looking for…and scripture tells us she mistakes him for the gardener.

“But she didn’t recognize him.”

This man with whom she had walked and talked.  She knew the sound of his voice…the sound of his laugh.  Surely she knew his favorite food and which sandal he put on first.  She was one of his nearest and dearest and yet she didn’t recognize him.

I get it Mary.  I don’t always recognize him either.

The truth is, he could be showing up in all kinds of ways for us, but our eyes could be too clouded with tears to see.  Or perhaps we’re too tangled up in the questions, the why’s and why not’s…the where’s…the when’s.  Or maybe worry and fear have draped us like a shroud.

And even though we’re trying to find him, peering around the corner of our circumstances for just a glimpse of his presence….we can’t see him.  He’s right next to us, behind and in front…but it’s all a blur.

Verse 16 says that Mary realized who he was when he called her by name.

What joy she must have felt!  To see her Friend and Teacher alive and well….I imagine a long, deep sigh of relief that her Savior was not hidden, but close by the whole time.  I imagine the pieces beginning to come together in her mind as she realized he had indeed kept his promises.

Oh to be able to reach out and touch the hands and feet of Jesus.  To be able to look him in the eye and know that it’s him.  To hear his voice call us by name…

That day is coming my friends.

But until then, could it be that he’s given us the gift of himself in others?  It’s community, right?  The coming together of the saints.  Being his hands and feet for one another.  Pointing each other to the way of his provision.  Speaking his truth, his words over our hearts and lives.

And little by little, may we teach each other to see.